Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize