Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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