i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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