New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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