Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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