we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!