Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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