curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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