haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize