escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
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Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
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it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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