I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
