Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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