you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
