Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
All I want is dick and wine.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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