Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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