You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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