too bad you live with your parents still
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
