So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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