Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
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