I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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