Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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