I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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