Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
