I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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