I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize