ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize