hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
