"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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