Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Just puked most of my soul out..
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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