Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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