Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.