Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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