i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
no you cant smoke seaweed
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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