Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Randomize