You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
