Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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