I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Is Oprah even human
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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