My brain says no but my pants say off.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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