She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
