Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
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I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
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my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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