i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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