Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
