at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Just high enough for therapy.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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