Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
