i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
