This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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