I hope mine doesn't look like that
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize