Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize