i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Green mimosas i think yes
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
