On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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